A Reflection on Voice, Surveillance, and Freedom

There’s a weight that comes with constantly being watched, judged, and silenced—even after the love has long left the room.

Lately, I’ve been feeling it heavier than usual. The irony is not lost on me: I posted my Breaking the Cycle blog, paired it with the song “Anxiety” by Doechii. One line in that song is “Somebody’s Watching Me,” and just like that—I get proof that someone is.

And not in a caring, protective way. In a way that seeks to control, distort, and report back.

A screen grab. A forwarded message. A “concerned” text sent from someone else’s phone—not even theirs.

Let me be clear: this is no longer about a relationship.

It’s about power. Control. Obsession. Abuse.

It’s about being targeted every time I dare to live, laugh, or look beautiful in a picture. Every time I show joy, I get punished. That’s not love. That’s surveillance.

For over a year, I muted certain social media accounts. I distanced myself for my own healing. Yet somehow, anonymous messages kept finding me. Every nice post, every selfie, every outing seemed to trigger a wave of random texts, nasty screenshots, and attacks from masked numbers.

Eventually, I had to teach myself how to trace these third-party apps:

Free texting sites. Spoofing services. Sites like “TextMe” and “Pinger.”

I submitted harassment complaints and takedown requests.

I downloaded scam blockers.

I blocked private callers.

I stopped sharing my life publicly.

I even dragged myself—exhausted and done—to the police station to file a report. And when I warned the number I would press charges, it stopped.

Until a new tactic appeared: triangulation. Using other people to get to me.

I’d go on a simple trip with family—Universal Studios with my mom—and suddenly I’m being harassed mid-flight because I dared to post a vacation photo. Accusations flew that I was “plotting” something for simply enjoying myself. It was disturbing, paranoid, and deeply unwell.

For a year and a half, I stayed quiet online to preserve my peace. But now, as I rise from the silence—here they come again.

Let me say this plainly:

This. Is. Harassment.

And I know I’m not alone.

Too many women have stories like mine.

Where exes and new partners use social media as a battlefield. Where living your life is treated like an act of war. Where jealousy becomes weaponized, and silence is demanded as a form of submission.

We’re expected to take it.

To shrink. To hide.

To stay quiet so they can feel big.

But I’m done shrinking.

Women should be supporting women—not stalking, not slandering, not tearing each other down to impress a man. Especially in a world already shaped by patriarchy.

You don’t have to like me.

You don’t have to agree with me.

But you will not silence me.

I am not the villain because I refused to break.

I am not the enemy because I healed without asking for permission.

This is my voice, and I am reclaiming it.

Let Me Live.

And if you can’t do that—then leave me alone.

I want to be clear: it was never my intention to use this blog to expose the harassment I endured. This space was created for healing, expression, and truth‑telling—not for drama, retaliation, or conflict. But when you’re pushed to the edge… you have every right to speak up. I’m not fighting dirty. I’m surviving—and I’m doing it the only way I was raised to: with dignity, words, and education.

If this sounds familiar to you—if you’re being watched, muted, messaged, harassed, or manipulated—know that you don’t have to face it alone.

A helpful resource is OnlineSOS, a free nonprofit that equips survivors of online harassment with legal tools, step‑by‑step self‑help guides, and connections to pro‑bono support
Another trusted hub—including support, documentation checklists, and 24/7 text hotlines like the Games & Online Harassment Hotline and Crisis Text Line (text HOME to 741741)—is the Cyberbullying Research Center

Disclaimer: This blog reflects my personal experiences and perspectives, protected under the First Amendment of the United States Constitution, which guarantees the right to free expression. I have taken care to omit identifying names or confidential details, and any resemblance to actual individuals or events is purely coincidental. Any attempts to intimidate, silence, or retaliate against me for sharing my story will be considered harassment and may be subject to legal action. My truth is not defamation—it is survival.